Tales of Great Customer Service
I ordered two computer related items recently via the Internet, and both experiences have been excellent and practically effortless!

BeachCamera.com - The printer I ordered from BeachCamera on Tuesday, May 8 arrived on Wednesday, May 9. And the shipping was free - incredible!

Espow.com - I purchased a laptop battery from Espow a couple of weeks ago. A few days after the purchase, I received an email from them stating the battery was not in stock, but would be by May 17 - and would I like to wait for it? I emailed back "sure, why not?" Yesterday, a week early, it showed up in my mailbox. Awesome!!

Can I forsee a time in the future when I do all of my purchasing online? When I no longer have to run all over the place to pick up items? As I turn into a slug sitting at my computer?

It's a good thing I'm still working out at the gym!

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#7 - You go into debt because the financial costs of practicing it are way too high.

I've spent quite a bit of money pursuing my playwriting/screenwriting career. I haven't kept exact track on how much (I knew it would hamper my creativity at the time), but I can estimate the costs as follows:

$1000 on writing seminars
$600 on airfare to Los Angeles for opening and closing weekends of Dearboy's War.
$200 on rental car fees in Los Angeles.
$250 for screenwriting software.
$150 on copying scripts.

That's $2200 - and it's a rough estimate. Granted, that's also over a number of years. Let's look at how much money I've directly made on this passion:

$500 award from the Arch & Bruce Brown Foundation.

Now it's not like I was in danger of going into debt. But as I've gotten less and less satisfaction out of writing scripts, I've certainly felt it in my wallet. Especially since those writing seminars here in DC have doubled their fees!

#1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move.)

#3 - Pursuing your passion clashes big time with your personality.

#4 - In pursuit of your passion you end up doing things that might be hazardous to your health.

#5 - You say it's your passion, but you spend 100% of your "free," non-work time doing just everything else BUT working on what you say you love.

#6 - In considering your passion, you experience "Klondike Thinking."

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#6 - In considering your passion, you experience "Klondike Thinking."

Klondike Thinking is all about "get rich quick." Like a prospector during the gold rush of the 1890's, you're preparing for the extreme discomfort of working by telling yourself "I can take the hardships for a short period of time, since the payoff will hopefully be enormous." The Klondike Thinker might:

stay in a boring, dull and dead end job and put off his dreams until retirement;
fear some initial discomfort in pursuing her passion, which keeps her from pursuing what she loves;
maintain a low level of involvement in his passion while everyone else is going full force;
throw away a perfectly satisfying life to chase a billion-to-one long shot.

The problem with this scenario? Putting too much emphasis on a specific, narrow outcome (make a ton of money, get famous, win an Oscar) and ignore the possibilities inherent in the actual pursuit. I wanted to win an Oscar for screenwriting - but I can't find much fun in writing screenplays. And I don't really want to move to Losa Angeles.

Once I realized this, I could see how I was using Klondike Thinking in pursuing my passion, and identify either what I needed to do to get where I wanted to go, or quit and pursue other interests.

Interests in which I like the panning for gold as much as, if not more than, the gold itself.


#1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move.)

#3 - Pursuing your passion clashes big time with your personality.

#4 - In pursuit of your passion you end up doing things that might be hazardous to your health.

#5 - You say it's your passion, but you spend 100% of your "free," non-work time doing just everything else BUT working on what you say you love.

Living in DC
I got "you need to" at the post office the other afternoon. Curiously, the postal employee was sincerely trying to help me.

I was waiting in line, holding an envelope along with a green "delivery confirmation" sticker.

"You need to send that priority mail," he said.
"OK," I said. "I'll do that."
He then said something else that I didn't understand. Since I didn't understand it, it made me a bit cranky.
"OK, I'll send it priority mail," I said. "What else do I need to do?"
"I can do it. Come over here."

And he walked off. So, I followed, to another, smaller service counter.

The employee took my envelope and the green sticker, placed the envelope in a clear-front priority mail enveloped, processed the sticker, took my money and stapled the receipt to my copy of the sticker.

He wasn't being mean or ornery. Nothing like that. He had come out from behind his counter and was trying to get the line of waiting customers moving. A few minutes before our exchange, he directed some instructions to the customers. "If any of you have to buy stamps," he said, "you can do that at one of the machines."

Nobody moved, probably because we all had some transaction that needed a live person.

But the postal worker was definitely trying to help us out. The trouble is, he was blinded by getting the postal processes right. He approached me with a solution by telling me the problem. But kudos to him for stepping out and offering to help!

Once I recognized this, I become much less cranky and almost pleasant.

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#5 - You say it's your passion, but you spend 100% of your "free," non-work time doing just everything else BUT working on what you say you love.

Music: you love it. You've got a guitar, you've written songs, you've performed in bars. People say to you "That song you wrote really spoke to me," and "You're awesome, what are you doing staying here?" Things like that. You know you're not a prodigy - you know that to get where you are requires tons of practice. But the weekend rolls around and you're taking the kids everywhere, you've spent three hours at the gym, you fall asleep on the couch afterwards, and when you wake up you try tackling that mountain of paperwork you've brought home from the office. When are you practicing? Writing new stuff? "I'll definitely do it tomorrow," you tell yourself as you watch the Sci-Fi Channel on Saturday night. The next day, you do it all again, and you get so much done. But not your music. Your guitar's locked in its case in the closet.

How do I know all this? I've been there!

#1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move.)

#3 - Pursuing your passion clashes big time with your personality.

#4 - In pursuit of your passion you end up doing things that might be hazardous to your health.

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#4 - In pursuit of your passion you end up doing things that might be hazardous to your health.

Let's say your dream is to become Mr. Universe. An extreme example of a dream, perhaps, but let's go with it. You're 6'1", you've been working out with weights since high school, you've even placed in some regional bodybuilding competitions. But in order to get to that lofty plateau, you find you're going to have to do steroids.* If you find no problems with it for yourself, then fine, great, go for it. But what if you have this nagging opposition to using? What if you push past that opposition, that voice in your head yelling "wait, don't!," and start anyway? What if doing that cycle gives you all sorts of physical and behavioral changes - insane acne, heightened aggressiveness, massive depression? Suddenly, you're ignoring clear signs that your body's not cut out for what you're putting it through. Sure, there are all those other people who have "done it," and they're fine, right? But they're not you! It definitely pays to weigh the costs of your dream against any personal harm racing after it may cause.

#1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move.)

#3 - Pursuing your passion clashes big time with your personality.

*Disclaimer: I don't purport to be an expert on steroid use or the controversies surrounding them, and this post does not aim to provide advice on them pro or con. This was the first example that came to my mind - so please don't beat me up!

Ship to Shore Communique
Atlantis Events sent me a response to the comments I sent them regarding their new Web site:


Mike,

Thank you for your feedback. Honestly, in our 16 years we've tried to sell cruises with a variety of photo images, and the ones that work are the attractive (and therefore somewhat younger) ones. My commentary in the site is correct -- it is marketing after all.

We've tested multiple images, and the ones that gay men respond to are essentially the ones that we have on the site. I don't think it's a question of responsibility, it's a question of running a successful business.

We're very honest with the content. Absolutely every photo on this site is a photo of real guests on a real vacation with us. And if you look a bit close, you'll find that it fairly matches the average age of our guests, which is around 39.

I also think if you look a little close, you'll find it's not all "buff", it's a variety of people in a variety of settings. But sometimes gay men miss the variety and focus on the physique. It's a common thing that we hear.

Also, I think the video content on the site addresses the variety of experience and clientele better than just the static photos.

We are rewriting some of the comments in the FAQ section. Those were written a while ago and need some updating.

I hope this sheds some light on our work and look forward to seeing you again on a future Atlantis vacation.

Thank you again for your comments.

Regards,
Rich

A Rare Opportunity
Atlantis Events, the gay charter company (which has ferried me on a number of fantastic vacations) is about to debut their new Web site. They've sent a test version of this site to "alumni" and asked for our comments. I'm excited, because it's rare that I have a prepared opinion saved up and ready-to-email! So, I sent them my posting from a number of months ago:

A Marketing Golden Rule.

I was thinking of sending along
Enough About You. What About Me? Some Thoughts on Customer Service Surveys,
but I don't want them to think I'm a crazy person.

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#3 - Pursuing your passion clashes big time with your personality.


I probably wouldn't make a great Trappist monk. Although the life fascinates me. Simplicity. Quiet. Focus.

I remember seeing a 60 Minutes piece on Thomas Merton, probably the most famous Trappist monk of all (if one can or should label a monk "famous.") He had fascinating things to say, and I read his book The Seven Storey Mountain not long afterwards.

But I know I wouldn't make a good Trappist monk for one reason: I'm a raging extrovert. A huge "E" on the Meyers-Briggs profile. I not only "get" energy from other people, I can feel it coming in. I don't want to be the center of attention, and I don't need to be onstage. But put me in an enclosed office for hours at a time, and I shut down. My brain ceases to function - all creativity goes right out the window.

And isn't that a major portion of a Trappist monk's life? Deep introspection, silence (or should I say lack of conversation)?

Sure, we all want and crave a certain amount of calm and rest in our lives. But if I were to pursue that as my passion, well, then passion would drain out of my life.

But I'm going to read The Seven Storey Mountain again. I've still got my copy. And one of the neat things about getting older? You don't have to buy as many books, since you forget what was in many of them...

#1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move.)

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#2 - You and your passion have a long distance relationship (and you aren't willing to move).

I thought I wanted to be a screenwriter. I wrote plays for 7 years, and even had one produced in Los Angeles. I met actors I'd seen on television, now playing the roles I wrote. It was all very exciting. So I started writing screenplays. But I live in DC. I briefly considered moving to LA - I even spent some time there, getting my bearings, seeing what it's like..

Trouble was, I REALLY didn't like it. I remember looking at the Hollywood Hills one evening, at the lights coming on in the cliff-dwelling homes, and I thought "I don't want that."

In my DC neighborhood, I walk to work, the gym, grocery stores, restaurants. In LA, I'd have to drive. In DC, I leave my house a few minutes before I have to be just about anywhere. In LA, I'd have to leave my apartment maybe an hour beforehand, and figure out the shortest drive to where I wanted to go. In DC, I have all this extra time, given to me because I don't have to commute. In LA, it would be all about the commute.

For a screenwriter, it's also all about the networking. In Hollywood. Not in DC. And it's really difficult if you're not living in LA.

Not that you have to move to where your passion resides, if it's geographically important. But I've found that distance can be a critical factor in deciding what I want to do with my life.

And I'm still living in DC.

Read Part 1: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

It May Not Be Your Passion If:

#1 - You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

For years I've heard "do what you love," and "follow your bliss," and "find your passion."

But what's my passion? What happens if it changes? How do I know if I should quit and do something else?

I've thought about those questions - over and over. And I've come up with some ways to measure for myself whether or not what I'm doing is REALLY what I want to do. Hence, #1: It may not be your "passion" if: You're in love with the idea of your passion, but you can't stand the component parts.

No matter what you do, no matter how exciting your passion may be, there are going to be portions of it that aren't all that interesting. Still, they shouldn't grind you down. I believe that you don't have to absolutely love everything about your dream, but those "grunt work" parts should still do something for you. Let's say mountain biking is your passion. What are the component parts? Well, you have to know about the bike's technical aspects (how much air in the tires, what type of tire for what terrain, what the bike's made of), along with safety concerns (types of helmets, other protective clothing and accessories), and where to ride (what time of year is the best, how crowded is it, how long does it take to get there.) If you say you love love love mountain biking, but bikes and fitness and terrains just bore you to tears, that may be telling you something.

I'll be posting these from time to time, and when I get to the last one, I'll include the entire list. I've come up with fifteen of these statements... who knows how long this will take!

There Comes One Of Them Now!
Turner Classic Movies is running a Guest Programmer contest. All you need to do is create a short video explaining why you should be chosen as Guest Programmer for an evening of movies on TCM and you might just win. Funny how they don't ask you what movies you'd pick. So I've gone ahead and NOT produced a video, and selected the movies I'd screen if I was chosen:

Because it's the greatest movie ever made.

Because it's out of its mind.

Because it's intensely frightening, hugely influential, and made for about $7.00.

Because it's the most underrated movie musical of the sixties.

It's About Joy
Fascinating article in Sunday's New York Times (titled "Seeking Fans, Ballet Scrambles for a Killer App") about the role of ballet in modern American culture, and the financial/artistic struggles of ballet companies in New York City and across the country. The article lists the usual tactics arts institutions employ to bring in audiences: "Girls Night Out" at the New York City Ballet, offering dessert and "girl talk" with ballerinas; newly-minted ballets featuring tried-and-true stories from other media like "Peter Pan" and "Dracula." I say "usual" because I read about this kind of thing all the time. Instead of trying to understand how to appeal to the customer when the customer says "I don't like or need what you offer," the institutions merely ape popular culture, and nobody wins.

But a quote by Italian choreographer Luca Veggeti really set my head spinning: “You have companies saying, ‘We have to do Peter Pan and Dracula,’ ” he added, laughing. “What is the point? You’re not like a TV program. You’re supposed to raise the cultural level of your audience."

I have never
never
NEVER
gone to any artistic performance to raise my cultural level.

I have always gone because I wanted to see something amazing, hear something incredible, or experience something transforming.

NEVER NEVER NEVER TO RAISE MY CULTURAL LEVEL OR AWARENESS!

I went to school for that.

While My Guitar Gently Weeps
The Washington Post story DC's commuters ignoring virtuoso violinist Joshua Bell as he played his rarified Stradivarius in the DC Metro during morning rush hour has generated much silliness among the online marketing pundits. I say "silliness" because, the way they're carrying on, you'd think this was a rigorous scientific experiment.

But it wasn't. It was merely a guy playing a violin in the subway. Something we've all seen before.

I'd like to see the experiment repeated, this time with P Diddy, Jennifer Lopez, or Clay Aiken doing some platform performing at 7:30 am. I think the results would be quite different. I bet there'd be a dangerous crush of people, and rush hour would slam to a halt.

Favorite TV Guys
I used to include this sort of thing in this blog, but I got away from it as the months went on. Still, I just want to take a moment and identify the guys currently on TV who make me stop zapping the channels. I might not watch the entirety of any show they're on (except SVU), but they do give me pause...

Mike Rowe of Dirty Jobs
Cleans up like a dream.





Chris Meloni of SVU
A barely stable(r) character.




Bear Grylls of Man vs. Wild
Who knew misery could be so much fun.





John Cena of WWE/Raw
You feared him in high school, but not anymore.

RE: Do "Straight" Bloggers Read "Gay" Blogs?
Many thanks to Dustin and Steve for not only reading my post on this subject (as they were quoted in it), but for taking the time to respond in the comments section. It seems that we're all pretty much thinking the same way! I could get all philosophical at this point and launch into a major wordfest about how the differences we seem to find in other people really tells each of us more about our own fears (and my fears I know all too well)... but it's finally spring in DC and it's Friday and we all want to go outside and celebrate the weekend. Thanks again, Dustin and Steve, for your thoughtful dialog on the subject!!

It Was Never About The Hills

I came to a major decision over the past weekend.

First, I'll set up the scene.

I was moving pretty quickly through the first act of my zombie movie's fourth draft, ruthlessly cutting line after line of text. And it suddenly hit me: I was bored doing this. Not procrastination-bored as in "I really feel like doing something else." Not dramatically-bored as in "this story is dull and not interesting me at all." But bored as in "I'm sitting here in front of my laptop, actively editing and re-arranging characters, dialogue and action, and I'm bored with the whole thing. Bored with dreams of being a screenwriter. No longer interested in visioning the movie as it might someday play on the screen. Tired of thinking I'll someday be able to look up my name on IMDB."

So I did the only thing I could do at that moment. I stopped writing. And I spent the next hour or so really looking at this "dream" of mine, which I've carried since I was a kid. And I could see that, while I've changed in those forty or so years, the dream itself has not. It's been been years of dreaming about attention (getting it), ego (building it), and rescue (as in "money.") The dream hasn't grown, hasn't morphed, and hasn't done anything but lay there and demand my attention when I'm trying to do just about anything else.

Now the dream has become a whiny, nagging partner, using fear tactics to keep my attention. "You'll die a mediocre person," it intimates. "You'll be totally uninteresting if you stop."

So, I'll be uninteresting, and I'll die mediocre, I told it. I decided that I would no longer write screenplays.

Suddenly, the whiny annoying voice of my "dream" had nowhere to gain traction. It kind of just layed there, powerless. And I felt... calm.

The Paradox of Time
Does this ever happen to you: It's Friday, and you look ahead to Saturday or Sunday and see a large block of time that you haven't designated for anything, and you think "I can fill that with some really quality writing time or research or working out at the gym!"

You look forward to it, you may even arrange your workspace or gather your gym clothes the night before. The weekend comes, and starting at 2pm (if that's the time you designated), you suddenly find something else you need to do. But you feel guilty.

Still, the guilt doesn't move you to your work space or the weights. The spark that was present those nights before just isn't there. Let's say you finally open up the file, look at the words glowing in front of you, or make it to the gym, but your body feels like the gun's gone off in the 100 yard dash, Literally. And you jump up out of your chair and head for the fridge or say "20 minutes on the elliptical machine should do it for today!"

One of my brothers described this very sort of thing when he had his first kid (my first nephew.) "I think of all these great things I can do, I can get done, once he's down for his nap," my brother said. "But when he's finally out, all I want to do is sit in a chair and turn into broccoli."

Life Intrusion
I look at the date of my last post - April 8 - five whole days. Might as well be a year, in blog time! I wonder, what should I say? How about a run down on the places I've been spending my creativity? Allright. Here's what I've been up to:

Developing a new blog, one focused on a small, niche audience.
Updating my resume, for my upcoming "Marketing Mike Initiative."
Writing my screenplay (EM:ZD, the zombie movie, 4th draft).
Investigating screenwriter blogs.

I've got a table covered with papers, and papers covered with notes. I wonder if I'm attempting too many things at once, and then I remember how I work best, in short, intense bursts of energy, alternated with brain-clearing physical activity like working out, biking, or just getting outdoors.

Shoe Movies
I watched "The Pursuit of Happyness" last night, and it was definitely more uplifting than "Children of Men." I really liked both, and I noticed something similar about these two movies:

They both had plot moments involving the main character's lack of shoes at critical times.

Is this my coincidence, or their's?