What's Up With Krooz?

I have totally ignored my blog. Hopefully Jimbo hasn't removed me from his blog list. There's a pretty good set of reasons for my absence. The two main ones: I started a new job in January, where I'm overseeing three web sites and creating three separate blogs; and, my laptop died. So I have not been able to surf in my living room while multitasking, my main method of getting ideas for this blog. After deciding I needed to spend the money, I ordered a new laptop from Dell. The laptop crashed within seconds of downloading a program on the first five minutes out of the box. The replacement laptop followed the same path. Dell was not able to a) deliver me a quality product and b) provide me with knowledgeable technical support and sound customer service, and I returned both laptops and let Dell know I would never purchase a product from them again. I've ordered a new laptop from a rival company, and I'm hoping it will work once I receive it next week. I'm also gearing up to re-engage my blog posting. I'm also hoping I can get motivated to start back at the gym regularly. But new jobs tend to monopolize your time as you balance the combination of learning curve, office etiquette, and concentration.

Reunion Generation

I belong to a generation of people who lived their lives going from one social sphere to another. Through the levels of education - elementary, junior high (now called middle school), high school proper, college, then grad school for some. In amongst those social milieus, there were others - various clubs, organizations, sports groups, etc. We moved in a progression through school, and in and out of activities, all the time meeting new people and making new friends. While we would carry some friends onward, and turn some aquaintences into friends, our steady march through school meant that we would have to lose touch with some people as we changed locations. Sure, some of those people stayed in our spheres, but the vast majority did not. It was a badge of maturity to leave high school and everyone you knew and loved and go to college somewhere else. Sure it was scary, but necessary - necessary for growth, we thought. If someone held on too tightly to the past - if they insisted on going to every high school football game once they started college - we saw them as somewhat flawed. It was imperative that we move forward, and a big part of that movement meant separating from one social circle and creating a new, often more diverse group around us.

Still, it wasn't like we wouldn't see our old old friends ever again. That was what reunions were for. Coming back to that homecoming game. Running into one of your best buddies at the mall. Keeping touch through holiday cards. And looking forward to the pinnacle event of them all - the organized reunion. We kept in touch with the major changes, high points and low points of our best friends through these tools. While we knew about computers, none of us had one. The PC didn't exist. Our biggest technical challenge was learning to type on an IBM Selectric. There was no Internet helping our communications fly at the speed of light.

There is a generally-used name for my generation - Baby Boomers (Boomers for short.) We define ourselves by our forward motion, by how many new people we can meet, become intimate with, pull into our ideas, or impress. We always look forward, to the next group of people, consigning those times we look back to those officially-sanctioned reunions.

Take a look at this great post by Seth Godin, which got me thinking about the Reunion Generation. In Facebook's generational challenge, Seth talks about how he's not used to using Facebook the way younger generations use it. He relates a small tale about a college student he knows who was able to contact tons of people in her upcoming class, so that everyone knew everybody before they set foot on campus.

This is, to me, related to information I've read about how the "younger generations" continue to be involved in their friends' lives through My Space, Facebook, and social media on the Web.

They build on their circle of friends as they go along. No need to move on to the next social circle, when you can keep everyone abreast of your life - and they, you - on a daily basis through online networks. I'm guessing that they don't see this continual contact as a negative thing, the way we in the Reunion Generation might. Their definitions of maturity don't involved sailing away from one shore and losing contact with the island altogether in search of the next beach.

Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow. Rrrrrright.

How many times have we heard or read this slogan? How many of us have done what we love, and we're still waiting for the money?

I've pursued a number of passions, and had some great experiences doing so. But the financial return on my investment in each case has not just been nil, but negative.

If we are to believe the "Do What You Love" phrase, then merely practicing a hobby should naturally fill up our bank accounts.

The truth, however, is far different.

For me, the money's always followed when I've done something I didn't particularly love.

However, I find tons of subjects interesting. But "Love?" That's asking quite a lot.

It's time to nuke this advice and and show it for the sentimental platitude it really is! I prefer to revise the phrase into "Do something you find interesting that also offers a salary or other cash renumeration and the money will follow."

While you make up your own newer, more accurate version, consider the potential dangers of "Doing What You Love," as described in Beware of Turning Hobbies into Jobs at Gaping Void.

And for a very effective dismantling of a similarly erroneous aphorism, check out I keep reading the argument that “Money can’t buy happiness.” It’s not that simple! at The Happiness Project.

My Top 20 Tactics for Taming Terrible TV Addiction Madness

I basically made one New Year's Resolution last week: to work on my TV addiction. It's been with me for a long, long time, from my early days when I rushed home from school to watch Dark Shadows, through my higher education years (majoring in Television and Communications - what else?) I've realized I need to do something to curb my nightly channel surfing activities, but I wasn't having much luck in figuring out exactly what to replace the tube with until I fell upon The 9 Step Television Diet (at Think Simple Now, by way of The Happiness Project.)

Tina's list of television's evil effects hit home for me, and her options for battling this particular monkey are simple and achievable. They also encouraged me to come up with my own list of Things To Do Instead of Watching TV and Ways To Battle the Madness. They are:

1. Turn the TV on later in the evening. (I got used to this when I was working at home all last summer and fall.)
2. Cultivate the ability to turn things off. (I turn off the stove after using it - think of the TV as the stove.)
3. Increase my stamina. (This helps with number 15, below.)
4. Replace with working out, a class, a hobby
5. Move to someplace more active all year round
6. Turn on the radio - methadone for TV addicts
7. Call people on the phone
8. Take the laptop to a coffee shop
9. Turn the set on, but turn off the sound
10. Figure out other relaxation methods
11. Go to bed earlier. (This will allow me to Get up earlier.)
12. Move the Tube - to a less central and accessible location.
13. Get rid of cable. (This one's tough, unless I really start thinking about what I can buy with the money I've saved after 6 months - which amounts to a weekend trip to the beach!)
14. Stay longer at work.
15. Move my gym workouts to the evening.
16. Do home improvements
17. Plan out tomorrow or next week (lunches, dinners, work plan, workouts)
18. Allow for some (few) days when I will watch TV the way I used to. (During blizzards. And cold torrential downpours. When I'm sick. Or after a particularly stressful week or month.)
19. Freelance! (Make extra money!)
20. Blog.

(I would put "reading" as number 21, but for me, reading can become an addiction too. So while I definitely think it's better than watching "The Biggest Loser," I also consider it the methadone of TV addiction cures.)

Why You Might Change Your Passions and/or Dreams in Mid-Life

I used to be all about performing. Onstage, in concerts. Watching others tackle my original work. Paying big bucks to see the masters at work. I've sung in Carnegie Hall and on CBS for the Kennedy Center Honors. I've watched as television actors made my words their own and gave life to my characters in Los Angeles. I've witnessed firsthand some of the most legendary performers of the 20th century.

So why isn't it all that important for me to work in the performing arts anymore? I have my reasons, which I'll list below. Perhaps you'll recognize some of them yourself, if you're challenged by a major shift in your goals.

But first, check out what Hugh Mcleod has to say about this phenomenon, in his post Allow Your Work To Age With You at Gaping Void.

Hugh advocates quitting and moving on. I'm analyzing the possible reasons why one would quit that support Hugh's take on the subject. The reasons?

Those things are no longer fun.
Pursuing them makes no business sense - too much money expended for less and less returns.
Quitting allows for investigating other options and opportunities.
You've found something better.
It was never about [fill in the blank], and you've had enough of what it's about.
You've lost faith in the issue/idea/area.
You've lost respect for the issue/idea/area.
You've fulfilled your dream and don't need to go further.
The money didn't follow.
You feel there are too many sacrifices you continue to have to make.
It was someone else's dream in the first place.
It was more about proving something about yourself than a love for it (the issue, idea or area.)
You're much more enamored of part of the dream than the whole thing.
You've found easier/cheaper/better ways of working at your dream.
You ran out of ideas.
You've decided the amount of work you have to do isn't worth it in the long run.
It really is too hard to pull off.

I used to dream about making movies. Now I dream about travel, following the sun, being outdoors, athletic activity.

But it is strange to say goodbye to a passion that's taken up so much time and energy. But it needs to happen, since the passion is just not there anymore.

How To Eat Healthier and Enjoy It in 2008
The long national nightmare known as The Holidays are now officially over, and 2008 has just begun. Time to throw away all the leftover gift chocolate, seal up the liquor bottles, and resign ourselves to Healthy Eating Madness. I know I can improve the quality of my food intake - my only problem is getting out of the chicken breast, broccoli and sweet potato rut. I searched a number of fitness sites, lifehack and diet blogs to come up with the following lists of healthy foods that might just help me introduce more variety into the potentially bland:

The 10 Best Foods You Aren't Eating - from Men's Health
Beets
Cabbage
Guava
Swiss chard
Cinnamon
Purslane
Pomegranate juice
Goji berries
Dried plums
Pumpkin seeds
Plus these extras:
Salmon
Beans
Blueberries
Quinoa
Walnuts/Almonds
Spinach
Artichokes
Tomatoes

The Top 5 Brain Health Foods - from Brain Ready
Wild Salmon
Cacao Beans
Matcha (Tencha-grade green tea powder)
Acai berries & Blueberries
Coffee beans

Top Ten Rejuvenating and Anti-ageing Foods - from Lifehack
Avocado
Berries
Green vegetables
Garlic
Ginger
Nuts
Yogurt
Whole wheat pasta and brown rice
Melons
Water

10 BEST FOODS/Super Foods for Better Health - from CSPI
Sweet Potatoes
Grape Tomatoes
Fat-Free or 1 % Milk
Broccoli
Wild Salmon
Crispbreads
Brown Rice
Citrus Fruit
Diced Butternut Squash
Spinach or Kale

The 29 Healthiest Foods on the Planet - from BellyBytes.com
Apricots
Avocados
Raspberries
Cantaloupe
Cranberry Juice
Tomato
Raisins
Figs
Lemons/Limes
Onions
Artichokes
Ginger
Broccoli
Spinach
Bok Choy (Chinese cabbage)
Squash (Butternut, Pumpkin, Acorn)
Watercress and Arugula
Garlic
Quinoa
Wheat Germ
Lentils
Peanuts
Pinto Beans
yogurt 25.
Skim Milk
Shellfish (Clams, Mussels)
Salmon
Crab

10 Super Foods for Better Health - from Dumb Little Man
Berries
CitrusVegetables
Whole Grains
Salmon
LegumesNuts and Seeds
Lean Protein
Olive Oil
Tea

Kick Start Your Day With These 11 Mood-Lifting Foods - from The Ririan Project
MILK
CHOCOLATE
WHOLE-GRAIN RICE OR PASTA
MACKEREL
BROCCOLI
COFFEE
TURKEY
LIVER
BLUEBERRIES
BRAZIL NUTS

10 Great Foods to Melt Away Those Pounds - from Diethack
Grapefruit
Chilies
Black Beans
Applea
Celery
Strawberries
Mackerel
Cottage Cheese
Low-Fat Milk
Lettuce

5 Power Foods to Live Longer - from Diethack
Spinach
Tofu
Blueberry
Avocado
Garlic

Foods That Burn Fat/The Top 10 Lists - from Burn the Fat Blog

Starchy Carbohydrates and Grains:
1. Oatmeal (old fashioned)
2. Yams (almost same as sweet potatoes)
3. Brown rice (love basmati, a long grain aromatic rice)
4. Sweet potatoes
5. Multi grain hot cereal (mix or barley, oats, rye titricale and a few others)
6. White potatoes (glycemic index be damned!)
7. 100% whole wheat bread
8. 100% whole wheat pasta
9. Beans (great for healthy chili recipes)
10. Cream of rice hot cereal

Vegetables:
1. Broccoli
2. Asparagus
3. Spinach
4. Salad greens
5. Tomatoes
6. Peppers (green and red)
7. Onions
8. Mushrooms
9. Cucumbers
10. Zucchini

Proteins:
1. Egg whites
2. Whey protein (protein powder supplement)
3. Chicken Breast
4. Salmon (wild alaskan)
5. Turkey Breast
6. Top round steak (grass fed beef)
7. Flank Steak (grass fed beef)
8. Cod Fish
9. Bison/Buffalo
10. Rainbow Trout

Fruits:
1. Grapefruit
2. Apples
3. Blueberries
4. Canteloupe
5. Oranges
6. Bananas
7. Peaches
8. Grapes
9. Strawberries
10. Pineapple

A Visual Guide to 15 Healthy Snacks - from Diet Blog
Raw Almonds
Raw Mixed Nuts
Dried Fruit
Mandarin
Apple
Banana
Grapes
Tuna
Dried Peas
Popcorn
Baby Carrots
Celery & Hummus
Cherry Tomatoes
Whole-grain Crispbread with Cottage Cheese
Bean Salad

Secrets of Success: The Other 8 Words

Over on the always fascinating web site TED (Ideas Worth Spreading), Richard St. John gives a three-minute talk on the "Secrets of Success in 8 Words." He's done his homework - compiling the top factors after 7 years of research and 500 interviews. The 8 words are: Passion, Work, Good, Focus, Push, Serve, Ideas, Persist. Watch the highly entertaining video for the succinct explanation behind each word:



It seems he's preaching to the choir - TED costs a bit to attend, so it's most likely filled with successful people. And the quotes he cites are from a rarified percentage of super-successful people: Rupert Murdoch, Goldie Hahn, Norman Jewison, Norman Lear, Frank Gehry, Bill Gates. He tosses in a couple of non-names too, but it's clear they're in the upper stratosphere as well.

I'm left wondering: what if you asked 500 less-than-successful people (identifiable through poverty level, how they view themselves, the newly bankrupt, etc.) what eight words they would come up with that describe the secrets to success? People who feel they're on the outside, looking in at the affluent and/or achievers might come up with the following, totally un-scientifically-developed list:

Money
Direct access to lots of money (through family or social sphere) makes it easier to be a success because you have a good fall back position.

Norms
While we've made enormous strides in reducing prejudice based on race, sex, sexuality, age and looks, I'm sure there are people who feel they've been held back due to factors beyond their control, unfairly judged, and viewed as against prevailing social norms (whether or not they really still exist.)

Location
New York and Los Angeles are the Emerald Cities in many minds - and locations within those cities may even bump up perceptions of success even more. It's probably harder to be a success in the wilds of Wyoming than in Silicon Valley.

Health
Chronic illness and lack of good health care can not only deplete any money you have, it can seriously damage your ability to get ahead.

Schooling
The Ivy League might still hold sway - Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stamford, MIT. Anywhere else, you're on your own, because...

Contacts
Attending those schools puts you in contact with people who can be of huge help to you in your career.

Genetics
I'll use an example from my own life, to keep totally clear on what I mean and keep from getting in trouble on this one. I have zero aptitude for math, which has been a problem for me, especially growing up as a "boomer" who hasn't yet been able to take advantage of the new mind thinking exemplified by A Whole New Mind. And I think it has a great deal to do with genetics, just as genetics has kept me from looking like John Cena.

Luck
The number-one determinant of whether or not you are a success in life. Many people court it on a daily basis - just look at how many lottery tickets are sold each day.

Of course, it all really depends on what you yourself consider "achieving success" really means. To some it's money, no doubt, especially those who are struggling financially. To paraphrase something a psychologist once told me, "Money becomes the most important thing in life when you aren't getting any."

One thing I feel above all else, however: Web sites like TED, which allow those of us without the current financial means to take advantage of today's top thinkers and doers, are a vast improvement over the past, when this type of information was harder to distribute and access.

Still, you do need a computer and Internet hookup...
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Awesome Everest photo from djwphoto's photostream on Flickr.

A Conversation About Passion, Dreams, and Waking Up

A compelling article in Sunday's New York Times, titled Often a Swan, Rarely a Queen, concerns a little-discussed problem with chasing our passions and our dreams. What happens when we get close to our dreams, but they're never fully realized? The article focuses on life in the rarified and hyper-specialized atmosphere of a world-class ballet company, but it describes an issue that can be universal:

"For the few who survive the grueling competition, relentless discipline and mental pressure to make it into one of the world’s first-rank companies, this tale of recognized talent and continuing achievement frequently ends soon thereafter. The new company member is now just one of a hundred or so other brilliant talents. When the level is that high, the exceptional becomes ordinary, and the dancer discovers that perhaps she will not be on a poster on bedroom walls."

It's a realization I've come to in my own life, as I have come to understand (perhaps too well) that I'll never win the Pulitzer for playwrighting, receive an oscar for best screenplay nomination, or take the stage as a competitive bodybuilder.

Hugh McLeod, in Post Dreaming Reality on Gaping Void, mirrored my thoughts a couple of days ago with this cartoon:


I especially like his words "kill slowly," as well as his succinct appraisal, in the accompanying text, of the stage we all probably get to:

"Then you get to a certain age and you realize that the time for "One Day" is over. You're either doing it, or you're not. And if you're not, a feeling of bitter disappointment starts hitting you deep into the marrow. Which explains why we all know so many people in their 30s and 40s having mid-life crisis'."

This reality could be a function of age - I am 50, after all, and I can feel my life adapting to all kinds of realities these days. Unfortunately, there no manual readily available to help us through this time. Something on the order of "How to understand your adolescent," but for the newly-middle-aged, would be beneficial.

It could be a fault in the way our society works. Too many dream careers require huge sacrifices and still leave many without the big fulfillment, perhaps because our vision of success requires huge, powerful, and largely financial outcomes.

I've posted about this before, and I've come to believe this passion thing is way overrated. But if you don't feel the way I do, you can still find plenty of information out there that will tell you how to Take your first step and Achieve Your Dream.

Some are disappointed, though, when their energy wanes in the pursuit. I've been battling the conflict between what I've always thought I've wanted to do, and what I really want to do now (which are two very different things.) Thom Singer may be feeling the conflict too, as McLeod's Post Dreaming Reality "flies in the face of my current quest."

But Brazen Careerist's Penelope Trunk offers us a solution. In Bad career advice: Do what you love, she counsels:

"If you tell yourself that your job has to be something you’d do even if you didn’t get paid, you’ll be looking for a long time. Maybe forever. So why set that standard? The reward for doing a job is contributing to something larger than you are, participating in society, and being valued in the form of money."

According to Penelope, "We are each multifaceted, multilayered, complicated people..." and "None us loves just one thing." According to me, getting rid of an old dream makes room for a new one. The trick is to recognize the new dream as one of many that may not bear any resemblance to the original.

Top Exercise Tips and Tricks - Super Leftovers

When I downloaded all the exercise tips and tricks for my previous post, I did come up with a category of tactics that had more than 17 ideas. There was a slight problem, though - these tactics all specified a specific method of working out, and I found it difficult to include them in a list consisting of ways to start an exercise program and how to keep yourself motivated. There were 29 of these in all:

• Slow lifting.
• One set, to failure.
• Good form.
• Hills.
• Circuits.
• Always Do Weights Before Cardio
• Clench Your Muscles
• Do Two Sessions
• Always Do Weights In front of a Mirror
• Hard, then easy.
• Workout first, diet later.
• Warm up.
• Close your eyes while exercising.
• Do a cardio circuit.
• Start with your hamstrings.
• Stretch between sets.
• Lower the weight with one leg.
• Run the rack.

I wanted to run them anyway, since they're all great advice. The posts I selected these from are listed at the end of my first post on this subject: Top 19 Exercise Tips and Tricks from the Blogosphere.

Now I need to go work out.

Top Exercise Tips and Tricks - The Leftovers
Tuesday's post on the Top 19 Exercise Tips and Tricks wasn't the whole story. When I categorized the tactics I found online, I had some leftovers - ideas that appeared four or fewer times. My original post was long enough - I didn't want to make anyone scroll and scroll for hours. So, I decided to publish these tips separately:

GET A PERSONAL TRAINER - 4 tips

DRINK WATER – 3

REMEMBER THE STRESS RELIEF BENEFITS OF EXERCISE - 3

JUST START OR RECOMMIT YOURSELF AND START AGAIN - 3

LISTEN TO MUSIC WHILE WORKING OUT - 3

DON’T SPEND ALL YOUR TIME WORKING OUT/DO SHORT WORKOUTS – 3

JOIN A GYM - 2

DON’T WORRY ABOUT WHAT YOU DO SO MUCH AS JUST DOING IT - 2

SIGN UP FOR A RACE 2

GET GOOD WORKOUT CLOTHES 2

MEASURE YOUR PROGRESS - 2

GET ADEQUATE REST - 2

DON’T CONCERN YOURSELF WITH GEAR - 2

DO YOUR RESEARCH - 1

TAKE A BREAK - 1

CONSULT A DOCTOR IF YOU’RE JUST STARTING OUT OR GETTING BACK AFTER A LONG HIATUS - 1

GET FEEDBACK FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY - 1
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...and click here for the original post, which features links to all the bloggers and posts I "stole" these from...

Abandoned All Hope - And Be Happier?

What with the short daylight hours, the dreary DC weather, my uncertain financial situation, no tropical vacation planned, the forced festivity of the holiday season, and winter about to show up for the next three or four months, my mood has been less-than-spectacular lately. So I found this short article - Hope Can Be Worse Than Hopelessness - very interesting and applicable to my situation. Could I be concentrating too much of my energy on wishing these temporary situations and mood-busters (winter, money, etc.) out of my life, instead of focusing more productively on actions (like networking) I can accomplish in the here and now?

If you had asked me, before I read the article, what I thought would make me happier, I would have said "money from blogging and working in Florida."

But that juxtaposition - palm trees/turquoise water vs. grey city streets - is what's doing my mood in. Or so I believe now, after reading:

“If your condition is temporary,” [Dr.] Ubel explains, “you’re thinking, I can’t wait until I get rid of this.” Ubel says thoughts like these keep you from moving on with your life and focusing on the many good things that remain.

Definitely something I need to work on.
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Read my previous thoughts on another paradox article from the New York Times Magazine's 7th Annual Year in Ideas: Do Winners (sometimes) Quit?

Top 19 Exercise Tips and Tricks from the Blogosphere

In just a couple of weeks, the holiday food madness will reach New Year's Resolution time, and most of us will lament the calories we've consumed and vow to get into shape. Should be no problem, right? "Life hacking" blogs can help us out. I visited 6 bloggers, 18 posts, and scanned over 200 items to come up with the following most popular tips and tricks that will get us exercising and keep us working out through the rest of winter:

FIND YOUR BEST EXERCISE TIME AND SCHEDULE IT ON YOUR CALENDAR - 17 tips in all
Tactics include: Don’t put exercise time in a place where it will easily be pushed aside by something more important. Find your best time of day for exercise. Schedule workouts. Do it early in the morning - during lunch - after work.

DON'T GET STUCK IN AN EXERCISE RUT - 15
Be a bit adventurous, try out different exercises. Seek a geographic cure.

START SMALL AND SLOW - 13
In the beginning, it’s best to hold back, and just do a little. Your goal is to set a workout routine that is challenging, but not overwhelming. If you’ve been inactive for years, you can’t run a marathon after two weeks of training.

GO FOR THE RIGHT REASON(S) - 11
Go for Yourself, Not to Impress. Focus on the feeling after the session. It’s Time for you/Time for contemplation. Don’t be motivated only by weight loss goals. Living long enough to see your grandkids … and play with them. Remember that your ultimate goal is an active lifestyle. Go for the long haul - Think of exercise as a life-long habit, and your goals will come to you eventually.

GO FOR THE OTHER RIGHT REASONS - 11
How you’re going to look. Fitting into new clothes. Being attractive. How you look in your before picture. The dread of feeling “yuck” from not exercising. The scale. Others commenting on how good you look. An upcoming day at the beach, or a reunion. Calories burned.

EXERCISE STRATEGIES A GYM TEACHER MIGHT SAY - 11
Stop making excuses. Think positive. If you fail, get up, brush yourself off, and start again. Commit yourself. Don’t worry if you’re not seeing results right away. Exercise even when you feel tired. Don’t get discouraged when you reach your plateau.

BE AWARE OF AND ANALYZE YOUR EXERCISE PROBLEMS - 11
Isolate Your Weakness. What are your priorities? Listen to your Body.

GET A WORKOUT PARTNER OR BUDDY - 9
Pick someone who is committed to their health. If you can't afford a trainer or a great instructor, or you don’t think you’re ready for one yet, grab hold of a friend with similar goals. Just make sure you don’t become so dependent on your gym buddy that you forego working out if he can’t make it. Make it a competition. Bet on who will achieve a certain goal first.

SET GOALS - 9
Set one easy, specific, measurable goal. Not weight-loss or muscle gain goals, but fitness goals. Think more along the lines of “I want to lose 20 pounds” or “I want to get down to a 15% bodyfat level Post goals where you can see them constantly.

MAKE EXERCISE FUN -8
If you don’t enjoy yourself at the gym, it is going to be hard to keep it a habit. Don’t let it be painful. If you like it you’ll keep at it. Exercise should be fun.

REWARD YOURSELF - 8
When you reach a goal, whether it is a little one or a big one, reward yourself. The first few days are the most crucial. Reward yourself often during this time. Reward Showing Up, Not Weight Loss.

MAKE IT A HABIT YOU WON’T QUIT - 8
If you can do exercise at the same time, every single day for a month, you are more likely to make it a habit. Avoid long breaks in exercising or rebuilding the habit will take some effort. Make Time. Don’t let a four day holiday interfere with your attempts to get in shape.

ADD MOTIVATORS - 8
Fitness magazines. A cover model picture on your fridge. Read blogs about people who are into running, losing weight. Find success stories
Print motivational quotes or put them on your desktop. Buy strength training books

MAKE IT SOCIAL - 7
Surround yourself with like-minded people. Get some friends to exercise together. Sign up for a class. Join an online group.

EAT HEALTHY - 6
Incorporate foods high in nutrients and low in fats and empty calories. Get the protein your muscles need to rebuild. If you do intense workouts, you will need carbs, or you won’t have enough energy. Don’t fuss over minutia like whether your getting enough Omega 3’s or tryptophan. Don’t get fooled by the deceptively healthy snacks just pretending to be good for you. You shouldn’t work out on an empty stomach — but you also shouldn’t eat right before you work out.

KICK UP INTENSITY AFTER YOU'VE BEEN EXERCISING FOR AWHILE - 6
Heavier weight. Duration Doesn’t Substitute for Intensity. Increment your exercise.

SET A TIME FRAME - 5
Do it for one month. Exercise Daily. Do a 30-day Challenge.

KEEP A LOG OR JOURNAL - 5
Do a workout, put up a star. Record the way your body feels after workouts and take body measurements.

GO PUBLIC - 5
Tell people what you’re doing! Make your goal public. Post your results on your blog.
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Here are the bloggers who did all the work coming up with the ideas, and the blog posts where you can find them:

13 Tips to Actually Enjoy Exercising - lifehack.org

Bored with your Workout? Let's Mix it Up a little! - Dumb Little Man

31 Ways to Motivate Yourself to Exercise | Zen Habits

16 Tips to Triple Your Workout Effectiveness | Zen Habits

How to Exercise like a Pro – even if you’re Not! at Ririan Project

How to Make Exercise a Permanent Habit In Your Life at Ririan Project

Seven Little Known Tips for Getting in Shape - lifehack.org

Finding a Healthier Lifestyle - How You can find the Perfect Exercise Routine – Dumb Little Man

6 Workout Hacks, Plus 8 Tips for Beginners - Dumb Little Man

Top 42 Exercise Hacks | Zen Habits

18 Ways to Supercharge a Boring Gym Session at Ririan Project

15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It) - lifehack.org

10 Ideas to Get You Exercising

4 Simple Steps to Start the Exercise Habit | Zen Habits

Home Gyms And Home Fitness Information: 7 Tips for Starting a New Exercise Routine

Get Healthy and Fit, Part 2 - Exercise Edition | Zen Habits

How to Get Back on the Exercise Train | Zen Habits

10 Benefits of Exercise, and How to Start Doing It at Ririan Project

Do Winners (sometimes) Quit?
Advice we've heard all our lives may be hazardous to our health.

Persistence is the keyword in life. From an early age onward, we're taught to keep at it, whatever the task, and not be swayed into nonaction by a little bit of failure. One of the first questions we're asked as children is "what do you want to be when you grow up?" The question turns into "what's your passion" once we get into our first job after college (when we're probably so far away from our passion that we just don't know it.) We're advised to Pursue Your Dream and Follow Your Bliss, and ignore the naysayers who counsel us "you probably won't succeed writing one act plays in Minnesota."

We're instructed to soldier on, whatever the cost.

As reported in Quitting Can Be Good for You (part of The New York Times Magazine's "7th Annual Year in Ideas" issue), researchers "found that teenage girls who are unable to disengage themselves from trying to attain hard-to-reach goals exhibited increased levels of the inflammatory molecule C-reactive protein (C.R.P.), which in adults is linked with diabetes, heart disease and early aging."

Now whether or not these findings are observable in the population at large is not known. But it tells me that my decisions to give up highly frustrating, little- chance-of-success goals may be a good thing. Even if it goes against everything I've been taught.

I do know that quitting a couple of projects I've spent a number of years on has opened up brainpower and time for me to pursue other goals.

Living in DC: We Regret To Inform You The Future Will Be Postponed

Sign on the front door of my corner mom-and-pop java cafe:

Please note that on weekends, WiFi service will not be available until 3pm.

Probably because the weekend crowd buys more food, and any weekday squatters will just take up "valuable" table space with their 1 mocha latte.

What I would do, if I owned the place: expand into the space vacated last week by the trendy clothing store. More floor space, more window space.

I guess Chris Brogan will have to wait a while longer before he can fully access the Internet in my neighborhood!

Holiday Party Refreshments That Just Don't Work

Penelope Trunk's post on Brazen Careerist titled Five things people say about Christmas that drive me nuts inspired me to think deeply about this holiday madness we're facing. Like all those holiday parties scheduled between now and January 1, 2008. I've been to my share in the past, and I've come to believe the following foods and beverages should be banned from all public and private places at this time (indeed, any time) of the year:

Cheese Balls
Always labeled "port wine," these seemingly efficient creations have one basic problem: once the first guest takes a portion from a fresh ball, it immediately looks like leftovers. And have you ever been to a gathering where one of these nut-rolled wonders are devoured down to the last cracker? SOLUTION: Serve cheese by all means. Just not processed.

Spiral Sliced Ham
This actually tastes fine, if you like ham. I can never navigate the proper-sized slice. It's always one continuous ribbon, difficult to maneuver into one of those small, cube-shaped rolls. I feel like I'm going to walk away from the table trailing ham behind me, like toilet paper stuck to my shoe. SOLUTION: Consider the spiral slice a given, and contribute your own slicing before you place it on the table.

Condiments in Ramekins
Closely tied to the Spiral Sliced Ham. Granted, a big jar of Hellman's and a blazing yellow Heinz squirt bottle does irreparable damage to the buffet table aesthetics. But mayonnaise starts to turn colors when exposed to air, and mustard gets all crusty. We won't even mention the food safety issues. SOLUTION: Nix the ham and you don't have to supply the condiments in any container.

Egg Nog
"I just drink it for the alcohol," you've probably heard people say. Any beverage that requires an excuse is subject to deletion in my opinion. And is there any justification for displaying a bowl of thick, whitish-yellow creamlike substance with that most unappetizing name? SOLUTION: Serve mixed drinks, wine and beer. Or soft drinks, if you're so inclined.

Kabobs on a Cabbage
My mom made this for a Christmas Eve party a couple of years ago. Sliced a cabbage in half and spent far too much time sticking it with cold cut-laden toothpicks. It looked hazardous. After guests consumed a significant number of kabobs, we were left with a cabbage full of holes to look at. Happy Holidays! SOLUTION: Don't read housekeeping magazines before the holidays.

Sparkling Cider
A product that is All About The Package. Why else would people buy and serve apple juice with bubbles, if not to approximate champagne. It's just sweet enough to keep it from being served with any meal course. Two glasses of this and I just start feeling sick. SOLUTION: Go to bed at a normal hour that night.

Which holiday party foods/beverages would you like to retire permanently?

8 Reasons Why Many Networking Events Suck
and how organizers can improve them...

I enter a roomful of people I've never seen before. I write "MIKE" in large block letters on a nametag sticker and attach it to my shirt. I feel marked, but nobody shoots. Nobody even looks. I wander through the throng, trying to find the bar. I can feel the noise. I reach the bar, order a drink and turn to see everyone in small, closed circles. How do I break in? I decide I can't, so I focus on the people outside the groups. Their standing alone, with dead expressions.

And how can I engage a zombie?

I'm pretty good at meeting people for the first time. I don't have a problem striking up and sustaining a conversation. People genuinely like me. So why are so many of the networking events I've recently attended so bad?

1. Nobody's acting as a connector, and people have to sink or swim. You can't tell the organizers from the attendees, and the organizers are most likely perched behind a registration table or inside one of those small, closed groups. It's the organizer's responsibility to make sure that people are connecting, and the shy are included, by searching out the loners, getting them introduced around, even providing icebreakers. Get helpers to move around, meet everyone, be visible. Have them wear funny hats. Jeff Pulver's methods at his recent networking breakfast are ideal for getting strangers engaged with one another. He should be cloned and distributed live.

2. Just when it starts to get decent, the organizers stop everything and start making announcements. Sure, you need to market the event and let people know about what's upcoming. But do you have to do that in the middle of my conversation? You may have cut short a million dollar deal (not likely, but who knows?) Send emails out the next day, create a handout you can pass around unobtrusively while people are talking, highlight your events on your web site. Just don't turn the crowd into a literal audience.

3. The venue is too dark, hot, crowded, noisy (or lacks carpeting). Loud music may require that people stand closer to each other to converse, but it also makes those small circles even smaller. Think about the American Need for Personal Space (read about "Body contact and personal expression") and do a site visit beforehand. You might not be able to remedy all the problems, but at least you can be ready to work around them.

4. Your event is advertised as networking when it's really a presentation (and some of those presentations may be about networking.) Close to #2, although attendees may feel more baited-and-switched. Make sure you haven't set up chairs in the dreaded theater-style. Ban PowerPoints, can the lecturers, and don't focus the group's attention. Provide multiple food/drink stations, and spread handouts on tables around the room - anything to prove we're not back in school.

5. Too much distance between the "old guard" and the "newbies." I went to a playwriting conference at Arena Stage a few years ago - I think I even got an invitation. There were equal numbers of established writers, artistic directors, and struggling playwrights. At lunch, the status quo all sat together, while we huddled at the kids table. Know who will be attending your event. Get clear on the range of people likely involved. If you aren't able facilitate some connections between the old guard and the new, then perhaps you should cancel the event, or at least not hold it again without some real evaluation (and not that checklist you hand out asking us how much we loved you.)

6. The event becomes a figurative fishbowl. Your monthly meetup is a big success. People mark it on their calendars and email you about the next one. Those small, closed circles of participants are really a measure of your success. You wanted people to meet up, and they have. The trouble is, your event has turned into Happy Hour With Friends. Put more time into developing how you want the event to unfold, rather than relying on the "y'all show up" kind of hospitality. Go back to your original reason for getting together. Your original goal is probably light years from "we want to keep the already-acquainted talking only to those they already know."

7. Networking is scheduled for the end of a long day of presentations. This usually happens at conferences. I've been to - and organized - so many meetings jammed full of lectures, slides and handouts, where any networking time longer than a coffee break happens at the end of the day. By 6:00, people are ready for drinks, dinner and conversation, but with their friends. So many attendees have told me they're "burned out" at the end of the day, yet they find the networking to be the best part of their participation. I personally know it's almost impossible to provide for additional mingling time at an annual meeting, where even the lunches are programmed. Someone, someday, will realize this and make the necessary changes. I think.

8. Unclear, or too wide-ranging, event objectives. Sure, I know the main methods of successful networking involves meeting people first, second and third, and then maybe you can get into what you can do for each other. But it's tough to get enthused about a conversation on financial planning when I'm looking to connect on a possible business partnership level. Icebreakers are great to introduce a focused goal - and they don't have to be intricate and minutely planned. I'll bet Jeff Pulver didn't spend much time explaining his goals at the recent breakfast - and you can be reasonably assured the event didn't try to be all things to all people.
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What would I have put down for my personal tag line? How about "Mike Ambrose: Making the Personal Universal."

The Internet Is For...

A song in Avenue Q tells us "The Internet is for Porn..." That may be the case, but it's also for Lists. And Litemind (the blog for "Exploring ways to use our minds efficiently") has just published a List of Lists, also know as The Lists Group Writing Project. I contributed "Top 23 Motivation Tips, Tricks and Tactics from the Blogosphere" and there are prizes to be had if my list draws enough eyeballs and votes.

But that's now why I've started entering these contests. There are even better outcomes:

1. they guide readers to my blog;
2. they raise my Technorati authority and lower my ranking (towards #1);
3. they introduce me to new blogs that I would probably have never found on my own.

So take a look at the list. My favorites:

17 POWER Tips For StumbleUpon Beginners
...because I need to learn more about this StumbleUpon thing everyone's talking about.

10 Ways To Work Through Your Workout
...because I've tried them and they work!

21 Punching Tips On Social Media Marketing and Social Media Optimization
...because it's a list of articles I can study later.

100 Resources To Improve Your Career, Relationships And Money
...because I'm wildly successful in all three areas (NOT!)

No Cost Business Tools: 37 Free Applications That Make Your Life Easier, Free of Charge
...because the future should continue to be free, or so I believe.

Edgy Characteristics
Yet another great Seth Godin post - The caricature of your brand - got me thinking today about the brands I'm familiar with and how they admit (or hide from) their most telling characteristics. These are the things that people talk about, the thoughts that enter the room before they do, the points that our constantly-sorting and redefining mind choose to remember. Here are a few of my thoughts:

Gold's Gym
Gold's has a charicature in its logo - that intensely developed bodybuilder, holding a barbell that bends under its own weight. Gold's was a gym before there were gyms, and tells of its early days on Venice Beach, California. Everything points to the brand being for muscleheads - but they firmly attach themselves to the general gym-going public. In a recent mailing to me, the facility I'm a member of touted its new coat of paint as a customer service benchmark. While the walls look nice, they're not exciting, and certainly not mentionable. What if Gold's went all the way with the bodybuilder image? Not to alienate themselves from their membership (most of whom do not look like bodybuilders at all), but to create a place that people would talk about. Have you ever heard anyone say "I just love going to my gym?" What if Gold's designed its facilities to take advantage of a retro-California-beach image? What if you entered the gym and you suddenly felt like you were inches away from sun, surf and sand?

Dentists
Think of a dentist and what comes to mind? Little Shop of Horrors? Dentists get a bad rap all the time. They're usually the worse-case scenario in many a conversation: "I wanted to travel to that meeting about as much as I wanted a root canal." Some are fighting back, acknowledging the fear of pain in potential patients by rebranding their offices with spa services and decor. What I wonder is, why doesn't the ADA take this a run with it?

Atlantis vs. RSVP
In the extreme-niche of Gay travel and vacations, Atlantis and RSVP are the two best-known companies. Both offer sea and land excursions. And recently, Atlantis bought RSVP. In their news release, Atlantis stated that they would keep the RSVP brand and continue to offer vacations through that label. But they never said exactly what that brand is. My friends and I have pondered the difference between the two. . RSVP was the first to offer gay vacations. Atlantis came in and... well, offered the same thing. But the caricature of an Atlantis cruise is tons of buff bodies, all night disco parties on the top deck, stunningly gorgeous men and slightly better ships. RSVP? TanDog (who's been on both) put it this way: The difference in eye candy between an RSVP cruise and and Atlantis cruise is the difference between an atom and the Universe.

4-H
Everybody who's ever been to a county fair knows the green clovers with the H's on each leaf. 4-H brands itself as the nation's largest out-of-school youth education organization. They know their caricature: Kids, Cows, and Cooking. Still, they've spent years playing down this image, in favor of chasing after more modern visuals and trying to convince the non-familiar that it's sophisticated and cutting-edge. But people love cows, and cooking (not so sure about kids).

Washington, DC
I've written about DC's image problem before - and suggested that the city embrace some of the aspects it's known for...

I can understand why companies and organizations would want to play down their most prominent features. Just look at how many people go for plastic surgery to "fix" what they feel isn't perfect. We all have a huge desire to blend in, not be noticed for what we're ashamed of. But we also want to stand out. Trouble is, we can't have it both ways (although we try and try and try.) Organizations that capitalize on their possibly-unpopular images could do themselves some damage, but could also be branded with a sense of humor.

Top 23 Motivation Tips, Tricks and Tactics from the Blogosphere

Stuck in a rut? Can't get going? Moving backward instead of forward? The blogosphere has just the solution for you. "Personal Hack" blogs list all kinds of tips to kickstart our flagging motivation. But I've been wondering - how much of this information is repeated? Not that there's anything wrong with that - sometimes I need to read something a bunch of times before it sinks in.

Inspired by LiteMind's Lists Group Writing Project, I downloaded motivation tactics from 11 blogs (searched through Google and Technorati), then tried to sort them according to some overall headings I created just to answer my question. And I found a combination of repeated tips and original tricks. It's all below - the headings I created, the number next to the title which tells you how many tactics in all there were for each specific heading, and after the list, the blogs themselves:

TAKE A BREAK AND DO SOMETHING ELSE - 14 Tactics
Interesting that the most cited tactic is to get away from work and listen to music, do something physical, or just sit with your eyes closed for a few minutes. But it makes a whole lot of sense, especially if you're a "nose-to-the-grindstone" type of person.

FACE UP TO REALITY - 12
The "hard work ethic" phrases we've heard all our lives, including: life is tough, work through the difficult, be patient, stop thinking - just do, stick with it, remember there'll be ups and downs. They work, unless you make a steady diet of them.

FIND AND USE VISUAL OR OUTSIDE MOTIVATORS - 12
I found two categories of tips under this heading: objects you gather which trigger your enthusiasm, and ideas (both conventional, like recognition and power, or "doing it for someone you love.").

CLEAR AWAY DISTRACTIONS AND FOCUS - 12
Eliminate the non-essential and focus on your mission, vision, and goals.

GET SOME HELP - 11
Because you can't do it all alone, "get a coach, take a class, join a group, get a workout/goal buddy, find others working hard, or create a friendly competition"

START AND FOCUS ON THE SMALL AND SIMPLE - 11
Concentrate not on the huge amount of work you have to do, but on the next, small simple step, and build from there.

MAXIMIZE YOUR CREATIVITY AND DO WHAT MOVITATES YOU - 11
Why spend all your time on the awful, painful tasks? Find what you like doing, the stuff that fires you up, builds from your creativity, and do that for awhile.

BE POSITIVE - 9
Nuke negativity.

SET GOALS - 7
One goal, long term goals, a major goal, unrealistic goals, or no goals at all.

DEVELOP A PLAN - 6
Timelines, deadlines, bite-sized chunks - create a road map that will keep you on course and make sure you don't spend all your energy right of the starting gate.

BUILD (AND KEEP BUILDING) YOUR KNOWLEDGE - 5
Read, learn, listen, investigate, and educate yourself self - all on an ongoing basis.

KEEP TRACK OF YOUR PROGRESS - 5
Track, chart, follow, evaluate progress and journal it daily, so you'll know how far you've come and how far you have to go.

INSPIRATION - 5
Seek internal stimulation.

ANALYZE YOUR DIFFICULTIES - 5
Reframe problems, deconstruct your fears, keep notes on when your motivation sucks, know when you urge yourself to quit so you can fight back.

CHANGE THE WAY YOU DO THINGS - 4
Kill repetition and introduce variety into your tasks.

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE HAVING SIMILAR INTERESTS - 4
Look for reinforcers of positive thoughts and feelings, good company, positive friends, passionate people of similar interests.

HELP OTHERS - 4
Share, encourage, help and be of service to other people.

REWARD YOURSELF - 3
Often, after completing a task.

MAKE AN OUTWARD COMMITMENT - 3
Post your goal, commit publicly, make it big and fully commit.

BEGIN THE DAY - 3
Start with a To Do list to kickstart your day.

GO BACK TO SQUARE ONE - 3
Ask yourself "why am I doing this in the first place," find powerful reasons why and write them down.

DON'T STOP - KEEP GOING - 2
It's all about building and maintaining momentum.

GET THE RIGHT TOOLS - 2
Don't use a saw to hammer a nail.
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Thanks to the following blogs for writing the posts I was able to analyze for this list:

Lifehack -
8 steps to continuous self-motivation
How to enjoy what you are doing no matter what
Thirteen tricks to motivate yourself
11 ways to motivate yourself to complete any task in the new year

A List Apart
Staying Motivated

Daily PlanIt
What's the Motivation?

MotivationTools.com
Seven Rules of Motivation

ZenHabits
Top 20 Motivation Hacks
Get Off Your Butt - 16 Ways To Get Motivated When You're In a Slump

Made for Success
Finding Motivation: What To Do When You Don't Feel Like Doing Anything

Dumb Little Man
5 Simple Steps to Stop Procrastination Today

Freelance Switch
Staying Motivated Without a Boss

Ririan Project
Why you lose your focus and what to do about it

Lifehacker
Ten Ways to Defeat Brain Drain

Ian's Messy Desk
8 mental steps to self-motivation

10 Remedies For "I'm Starting My Own Business And I'm Paralyzed With Fear!"

The past two weeks have been rough! I developed "Total Fear Paralysis At Going Out On My Own" and turned to the drugs I know will best numb the panic for me: McDonald's, television, and getting lost in the Wikipedia. Still, I kept thinking "Who am I kidding? My consulting will never get off the ground and fly!" That is, when I wasn't thinking about the bills coming in, especially the money I owe over the next year for my building's brick repointing project. Yikes!

Instead of moving on to stronger drugs (like jumping out my fourth-floor window), I scanned the Web for blog postings from people in the same dire straights. I tried to find personal stories, along with examples of errors I'm afraid of making and advice stronger than "Buck up, you'll be fine." And these are the people who spoke to me:

1. Sometimes it feels like...
Thanks to this post by Seth Godin, I know that even the most successful can hate their jobs. Although written as the dust settled from the Dot Com Bust, it's still applicable today.

2. Timing is never right
on Go Big Network reminds me that the planets align for very few people, and I'm really lucky since I don't have to worry about quitting my job (since I was partially laid off a few months ago!)

3. Reasons to Quit
from 43 Folders shows me I'm not the only person coming up with too many ideas that might not work, and alleviates my guilt in abandoning some to concentrate on others.

4. My Top 10 Worst Ideas to Make Money
at Shoemoney assures me it's ok to have those ideas, even if they're dumb - and it's better to learn from others before I spend tons of bucks.

5. Should You Start Your Own Work at Home Business?
at Life Learning Today gives me the pros and cons to going out on my own so I can build my confidence all over again.

6. 10 Stupid Mistakes Made by the Newly Self-Employed
tells me "Hey, if Steve Pavlina can make stupid mistakes, then my stupid mistakes can't be all that bad!"

7. Hate My Job stories
at Startup Nation give me the sense that I'm Not Alone.

8. Why is it so scary to go from corporate drone to entrepreneur?
at Escape from Cubicle Nation not only asks the same question I'm asking, it gives me some answers.

9. Entrepreneurship: What To Do When You’re Scared Sh*tless
on IttyBiz reveals there aren't just a few people out there like me, there's probably millions.

10. Stop Reading Lifehacks!
at Jack of All Blogs gets me off the computer and Taking Action.